do something that scares me
bungee jumping
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| bungee jumping |
The stairs creaked as I made my way up to the looming platform in the sky. I refrained from peering over the edge at the turn of the staircase. The climb has got to be the worst part, I thought, once I get up there it won’t be that bad. Reaching the top, I kept my composure in check. I gave simple answers to the tattooed adrenaline junkies working the top and tuned out their foreboding scream-o music and focused on my breathing. You will be fine. You will be fine.
I sat on the makeshift bench and let the attending take care of my safety. With a backup harness on my waist and just a towel and rope wrapped tight around my legs, I made my way to the edge. I can’t, I can’t, I said as I struggled to tip toe forward to the bitter edge of the platform. He instructed me how to hold my arms; I promptly forget and reconciled with the fact I was going to snap my neck at the bottom.
“You can. Now smile at the camera and jump.”
Are you kidding me? Smile at the camera? I’m not worried about looking nice for a picture I’m about to jump off a freaking 164 feet ledge!
Every cell in my body screamed not to inch closer, not to look down, not to jump off the platform; but I overcame the sharp stinging protective instincts and leapt (well more like fell) towards my imminent arrival at the lake below. My eyes squeezed shut as the air whooshed past, leaving my still churning stomach 164 feet above.
I’m gonna throw up, ohmygod I’m gonna puke right into that lake. Oh no, I’m going back up again. OPEN YOUR EYES!
My limp arms flopped like a rag doll as the weight of my body tightened the chord of the rope and shot me to the top like a rock soaring out of a slingshot. I caught back up with my stomach and frozen voice-box at my jolting return to the top. Screams and curses flew uncontrollably out of my mouth as the cheers from those yet to experience this paralyzing terror erupted below.
Okay how many times do I bounce up and down like a yo-yo? I should have counted the people who went before me. Ohmygod I’m cursing and everyone is cheering for me I sound ridiculous. Oh shoot what was I supposed to do with my arms? Chin down and dive arms right? Well I messed that up. I wonder if they can tell how terrifying I am. Alright, seriously now I’m ready to get down.
As the strong attendant lowered my shaking and limp body onto the raft to untie my feet he asked how it was.
Terrifying, incredible, life-changing, stomach-dropping, heart-pounding, unnatural and unreal, never doing it again, can’t believe I closed my eyes, get me out of here, get me a drink, how am I still shaking?
All these thoughts ran through my head and all I managed out of a scratchy through and shaky voice was good. Feeling failed as a creative writer but accomplished as an adventurous soul I made my way to the next victims, as innocent as sheep waiting for the slaughter, all eager to hear about my experience.
“That was the most terrifying experience of my life,” I recounted my entire body still quivering uncontrollably; the cells that previously warned me not to jump were now rejecting the adrenaline and punishing me for putting them through so much fear.
“Was it easier to go face first instead of dive?” A friend asked.
“Is that what I did?!” I asked unable to recall the pinnacle moment when I jumped. She laughed and began her journey up to the steps.
Poor chick doesn’t even know whats coming.
I shook my head and headed to the bar to grab a drink before my turn at the swing, which I knew would be a breeze compared to the stomach-dropping, death-defying jump I had just accomplished. Before I my fingers could stop shaking my group made our way to the three-person swing. We were to be strapped in then hoisted up and back so when released we would swing out have the most amazing view of Cairns. I was completely calm until they began to raise us up.
Why are we going so high? Oh no we’re as high as the bungee platform. I didn’t think it would be this high. It’s raining. Of course it would rain as we go up. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. The light is green. Oh shit the light is green. Amanda is gonna pull that rope soon and we are going to fall right on our faces; straight down and land on our face in a bush. Why hasn’t she pulled it yet? Come on Amanda pull the freakin’ rope! Here we goooo!
For an instant we were floating through the air, separated from the harness as we fell and then were swung through over the ridge and back. My petrified screams soon turned to insane laughter as the swing slowed. My heart rate returned back to a normal rhythm and the smile spread across my face.
I can’t believe I did that. I can’t believe I did that. I am SO glad I did that.
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